何必回来马来西亚

Jocelyn Yow, the youngest mayor in California, from Kedah, Malaysia

我的孩子如有机会在国外发展,我不会反对了。我在这里生根了,走不掉了,但如果他们有选择、能选择,不必眷恋这个地方。

25岁的尤煜琳成为美国加州东谷市长,本国媒体竞相报导,以她曾在吉打生活过一阵子引以为傲。Well,她其实是美国人。这件事,值得骄傲吗?为什么我只觉得气恼?

我的堂兄早已是美国公民了,在纽约创业经营软体公司。我的同学现在是矽谷英戴尔的工程师、是英国的消防工程师、是台湾、纽西兰的专科医生。作家陈大为、钟怡雯等入籍台湾,诗人假牙在英国,英文作家皮里答去了法国。导演蔡明亮在台湾发展,据维基资料也已获居留权。这些都是和我有过交集的人,你也来算算,你身边有多少亲友已不在马来西亚?

Jocelyn Yow maybe from Kedah, Malaysia, but she is an American
Jocelyn Yow maybe from Kedah, Malaysia, but she is an American.

能怪他们吗?且把爱国这谎言扯破吧!不管华人还是印度人,都在外国生活得很好,最歧视我们的人大多在这里的国会,并不在外国。他们也未必真心歧视,或许只是表现歧视,好激发更多人和他们一起歧视,以制造偏见为手段巩固对己方的支持。要爱国到哪里都能爱国,就爱那个欢迎你落地生根、赋予平等机会的国家。

我们的政客每年都很努力地逼人才远走他方。施政不公的影响是多层面的,人才并不完全因为不满而离开。政策短视加上贪腐,国家应有的发展并未发生,于是国民收入增长缓慢,生活水平也没有显著提高。如果你的孩子能在国外获高薪厚职,请问你愿意为了虚妄的爱国概念,扰其前程,要他回来多奋斗十年也未必能过更好的生活吗?

倘若孩子希望在艺术领域发展,要在我国谋生更是困难。教育体系失效,人文素质低落,政府长期忽视,没有建立能供艺术工作者发展的健全生态,艺术在我国没有市场。在这里他能展露锋芒吗?还是要像读电影系的张吉安那样耕耘十余年,然后得在国外才受肯定?他的作品回到来还要面对质疑呢!说的也不止是电检局。如果孩子在外国能受认同,能找到发展机会,你忍心叫他回来马来西亚吗?

我很气恼。我的青春岁月耗去了,少时对国家未来的妄想已然破灭,我们进步得实在太慢。我依旧喜欢在这里生活的,但已不会盲目爱国,也没必要这样呼吁。我还是希望这里变得更好,但这是因为符合我的利益,没什么感情因素了。如果我曾经爱过,这份感情是让政客逐年逐年、一点一点地摧毁的。

还没看到尤煜琳的政绩,我们为她骄傲什么呢?该骄傲的是美国,他们能接受一个“外来”的亚裔女性,还推选为市长。如果尤煜琳继续从政,她甚至有资格、有机会成为总统呢!如果她生在马来西亚,可能连本地大学都进不到。我们骄傲个屁。


2020.12刊于南洋

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8条评论

  1. This article make my blood boiled!
    Migration is a very personal choice, some prefer to live in a diff country and they did because they can. Some want it but for various reason they don’t even if they can, for some they can’t afford even if they want to.
    Either to leave their elderly parents or financial restriction or simply standby the country they love (love the country do meant love the government), it’s a very personal voice that everyone make.
    What pissed me about this article is like someone came out of a restaurant and tell the hungry beggar on the street that “I am so glad I am not hungry”!!
    Or tell the person on diet “I am so happy I ate”.
    Your choice of leaving the country is your choice and there is no reason to demean and belittle the country where you were born from, most of your relative, family, parents, friends are still living in that country they called home. I am proud of my country Malaysia do not mean I agree with who governed it, we continue to hang in here living with anguish for the political problem to have let those left the country to make you feel like a fool is appalling.
    I am absolutely happy for people who find better future in any part of the world, go wherever there is a better life, I say the same to my children but I remind them their roots and be grateful where they were from.
    A good person will not bad mouth your ex-husband why should you demean the country where you were once live in and your relative and friends are still leaving in!

  2. Thanks for your comments. To clarify:
    1. I am here in Malaysia. I live here. I have friends and family here.
    2. I am not belittling or bad-mouthing my country. I am talking about the politicians.
    3. I am not leaving the country. I have been contributing to the society, and will continue to do so.
    4. Do let us know your name when you comment. You know mine.
    Thank you.

  3. hi Malaysian,
    I think you should re-read this article to truly understand what the writer really wants to express.

    and to the writer of this article, 我完全理解你的心情也非常认同你写的文字。

  4. Dear Malaysian. I observed that you may have read the article in isolation and not in totality resulting to what I supposed that you may have misconstrued the actual meaning and messages intended by the author, Ruoh Peng.

  5. Hi Ruoh, I guess I understand your sentiment. So many Malaysians, including yours truly, choose to leave Malaysia because they see no future in the country they love. But I disagree with you that we shouldn’t be proud of Jocelyn Yow. I think the fact that she got elected in this very contentious election is already something we should be incredibly proud of. I’m proud of her, just like I’m proud of Michelle Yeoh, Jimmy Choo, and many other Malaysians who made it big in their fields. It speaks highly of Malaysia and of them, we breed creative, hard working, resilient kids who are very different from kids from day China or Taiwan. It helps me lift my head a little higher every time I say that I’m from Malaysia. This is regardless of whether Jocelyn succeeds in her role as a mayor. She may or she may not, it depends on a lot of other factors that are not within her control. But we should still be so proud that a child of our country earned the trust of Americans. It speaks volumes about the Malaysian spirit.

  6. Technically, Ms. Jocelyn Yow is an American. It is definitely an achievement for her, I acknowledge that. Maybe her time here in Malaysia had something to do with it. And we should be proud of that.

    But as you have so accurately observed, I am writing about how our government let us down. Ms. Yow just sparked this line of thinking. She is not the main subject, actually.

    “It helps me lift my head a little higher every time I say that I’m from Malaysia. ”
    I’d try to do the same.

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